First Presidential Debate Summary


Romney’s dead-on “Creepy Doll” impersonation seemed to disconcert President Obama.

Debate Summary:

Jim Lehrer: “Gentlemen, the country’s infrastructure is crumbling. Can you explain exactly how you will address this critical issue? You first, Governor Romney.”

Mitt Romney: “Americans are hurting from four years of me not being president even a little. I will reach across the aisle to work with Democrats right after I destroy their cherished healthcare plan and replace it with something different but just as good. I’ll get back to you on exactly what after the election, but I promise it’ll be excellent.”

Lehrer: “Governor…”

“Shut up, Jim. I’m still talking.”

Lehrer: “Mr. President, your response.”

Obama: “Jesus I’m tired. Do I really have to stand here and debate this clown? If you don’t realize how crappy his ideas are by now, you’re too stupid to live and I’ll never convince you. Also, Osama Bin Laden’s dead. I did that. What more do you want from me?”

Lehrer: “Thank you, Mr. President.”

Obama: “Great job, Jim. Can I go home and sleep now?”

Sarah Silverman’s video is trenchant political commentary with a soupcon of potty humor and dick jokes.

Let My People Vote – Get Nana a Gun

It appears that the pesky independent judiciary is slapping down one GOP-sponsored voter-suppression law after another. Fricking huzzah. I credit Sarah Silverman’s amazing video, “Let My People Vote – Get Nana a Gun” for the turnaround.  Check it out. 

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9 Responses to “First Presidential Debate Summary”

  1. sarah Says:

    Well I see we watched the same debate, left you a bit at a loss, hard to call the potus a winner in this one. That’s ok, he’s probably just trying to make Mr, Romney relaxed, and then he’s going to go in for the kill! We will have to wait and see what michelle thinks after she gets back from shopping JCrew with the 47%. That evil anne romney with her nice clothes, I hate it when wealthy people dress well and behave nicely.

    • Paul Murphy Says:

      I didn’t call POTUS a winner, what with him not winning and all. Tragically I failed to see what the First Lady and Mrs. Romney were wearing. My bad: I’ll have to wait to see what Tim Gunn has to say. So did Michelle do something lower class, like punch Mrs. Romney in the face or wear white after Labor Day? Shame!

  2. Eric Goldberg Says:

    Paul – After reading a mostly un-funny CNN “25 Funniest Tweets About The Debates Last Night” article, I’m absolutely persuaded you should be paid for this. Please let me know to which public official I should write arguing that you should receive a government grant which, with luck, you can receive before January 21, when Big Bird is ceremonially decapitated to celebrate the first day of the Romney administration.

    • Paul Murphy Says:

      Thanks for your kind words, EG. But if Romney wins I’m on the tumbril right next to Big Bird. We’ll be singing the Marseilles in two-part harmony all the way to the guillotine.

  3. Mme. Tussaud Says:

    If Romney wins, will he take away Reagan’s crown as our most lifelike president?

  4. Dounia Says:

    This is by far the BEST summary I’ve read about the first debate. Clear, concise, and sums it up perfectly. Oh, and it made me laugh so much! I also really enjoyed your post on the second debate – congrats for being freshly pressed with that one!

    Thanks for the laugh, and I hope you have a great weekend!

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