My Tax Plan

I got into an illuminating discussion with a fiscal conservative friend the other day. He said, “Every time the government cuts taxes, revenue goes up. It happened under Reagan, under Clinton, under Bush. It’s a fact: you cut taxes, revenue rises!” Well, how can I argue with a fact?

But wait a minute! Logically, if we cut taxes way back – like to a nickel – government revenue will go up to like a billion-skizillion dollars, and we’ll be in Fat City! Heck, we might all get big tax rebates! I immediately shot off an email to President Obama. I expect to hear from the Nobel Prize people any day now.

Later, my conservative friend pointed out how bad our government was. He said, “We’re choking on big government. By its nature, government is intrusive, inefficient and corrupt. The bigger the government, the worse it gets. The only way to keep government small is to starve it!”

Uh oh. Hold on a second.

So if we follow my plan and cut taxes, government revenue will go way up – which will result in a bigger, more intrusive, inefficient and corrupt government!?! Holy crap.

Apparently my plan needs some work.

Somebody please tell President Obama and the Nobel Committee I’ll get back to them.


Ebby Watch

For those of you wondering how Ebby the Wonder Dog is doing on her new medications, I’m happy to announce that she continues to improve. In fact she’s taken to frolicking, jumping up and down and scratching at my leg demanding attention. It’s like being mugged by a big, hairy, arthritic turnip.  


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6 Responses to “My Tax Plan”

  1. Scott G. Says:

    Funny… I was just reading about this topic at – took me a bit to find it (I was expecting it more from or Michael Shermer).

  2. Scott G. Says:

    Facts are essential! How do you know what to ignore if you don’t know the facts?!

  3. Laffer Curvy Says:

    If you cut taxes to zero, the government intake would be so high that Obama could truly carry out his socialist agenda.

  4. Laffer Curvy Says:

    But wait! If taxes went to 0, and Obama carried out his complete socialist agenda, he would have to take all our money away in taxes, which is the centerpiece of his socialist agenda. But then taxes would not be 0! Aaaaargh! I feel like the computer on Star Trek required to figure pi to its last decimal place (which thereby killed the spirit of Jack the Ripper).

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